Of course I've been doing my research and checking out the polls to get a lay of the land. From what I'm reading, Mitt Romney will be my most formidable opponent. They don't write much about him, but when they do they use words like "it's his turn" or "he has the money to do it." But if he, Mike Huckabee, Newt Gingrich, Rudy Giuliani, Tim Pawlenty, Mike Pence, John Thune and Donald Trump spread the electorate enough, I could squeak by in the early primaries which will help me with my name recognition and fundraising.
Many people are probably wondering by now why I haven't mentioned Sarah Palin. Well, it's simple. There are hundreds of articles and video clips of pundits from across America which go to great lengths to explain in microscopic detail that she can't win. They've ripped apart her poll numbers, questioned her gravitas and discounted her base as uneducated celebrity worshippers. Based upon what is being written and said in the media, it should be a piece of cake to beat her. I won't even address her during the debates.
How will I know if I'm viable? This is going to be the key to my making my decision. Don't get too excited yet, supporters. I have to make sure this thing is a lock, like Baltimore winning the 1969 Super Bowl or New England winning it in 2008. My pollsters and advisors are going to make sure that I have at least as much of a shot as George H.W. Bush did in 1980 or Hillary Clinton did in 2008. If I poll anywhere near Bill Clinton did in the summer of 1991 or where Ronald Reagan did at the RNC in 1980, I'm out. I'd hate to be the next Palin with everyone in the media talking about how I couldn't win.
Hey wait a second. My neighbor Billy can't win the presidency. Why isn't the media paying all that attention to why he can't win the way they are with Palin? I'm confused.